What a weird and wacky offseason! Weird and wacky I say!
Recapping everything that's happened would be as monotonous an exercise as recounting every malapropism ever spoken by our previous President, so let's just stick to the most important events of the last few weeks:
LeBron and Bosh Head South
It's hard to even fathom at this juncture. Not only does Miami have two of the three best players in the league on its roster, it also has another top-20 player who doubles as one of the best big men in the game. Add a deadly sharpshooter (Mike Miller, who shot 48% from beyond the arc last season), competent role players (Haslem, Ilgauskas, Chalmers, Joel Anthony, James Jones, and possibly Carlos Arroyo and Juwan Howard), and a decent head coach (with Pat Riley waiting in the wings if things go awry), and we easily have the makings of a 65+-win team (barring injury or a tactical nuclear strike on the state of Florida).
What's even more disconcerting is the fact that the Heat were a 47-win team last season without LeBron, Bosh, and Miller. I think we can safely assume that LeBron is an astronomical upgrade over Quentin Richardson, and Bosh a titanic improvement over Michael Beasley (strangely enough, I think Miami will miss Jermaine O'Neal and Dorell Wright slightly-repeat: slightly).
"The Decision"
As ill-conceived a P.R. move as we'll ever see in this day and age, so incomprehensibly idiotic that it defies any and all logic, even in the world of professional sports. While the subsequent wailing and gnashing of teeth among journalists and fans has been a bit much, it's certainly hard to defend the hour-long ego-fest which LeBron and his handlers had undoubtedly been planning for months. Then again, at least we'll have something from this offseason to look back at and laugh about in the years to come (well, unless you're a Cavs fan, in which case I offer my deepest sympathies).
Chicago is Utah!
While the Bulls struck out on the Big Three of this year's free-agent class, the additions of three erstwhile members of the Utah Jazz (Carlos Boozer, Kyle Korver, and Ronnie Brewer) were more than adequate consolation prizes. With Noah, Boozer, and Deng up front, Chicago has arguably one of the best front-lines in the East, and the backcourt tandem of Rose and either Brewer or Korver is nothing to scoff at either; although presently I'd be hard-pressed to rank them ahead of Miami, Orlando, or Boston, any improvements made to the bench (though a group consisting of Taj Gibson, Korver/Brewer, Omer Asik, and James Johnson isn't necessarily terrible) in the coming weeks and months could be enough to propel the team into the top three of the conference (most likely at Boston's expense).
Joe Johnson Re-Signs with the Hawks
You would think by now that the achievements of R.C. Buford (San Antonio), Sam Presti (Oklahoma City), Kevin Pritchard (recently and unjustly ousted from Portland), Daryl Morey (Houston), Kevin O'Connor (Utah), and other savvy G.M.'s would have led to a league-wide embrace of a new paradigm entailing a bolder and more nuanced approach to team-building, as well as a keener appropriation of resources and money by both G.M.'s and owners. Of course, these principles have all but been unheeded, as can be evinced in the Hawks' soon-to-be-indefensible resigning of Joe Johnson for six years and $120 million (!).
Look, Joe Johnson is a fine player (though by no means a superstar) and it's more than reasonable to suggest that Atlanta had no other choice but to resign its only true star; however, one can't help thinking that by taking the road less traveled (i.e. letting Johnson go or moving him for other assets in a sign-and-trade), Hawks' management could have positioned the franchise nicely for the next 5-10 years. Instead, Atlanta's stuck with a team that's no better than fifth or sixth in the East (depending on how you feel about Milwaukee), with really no chance to improve outside of trading a core player or getting lucky with a mediocre draft pick.
David Kahn: Madman? Or Genius???
Quickly becoming the laughing-stock of the NBA, David Kahn has proven himself to be of the utmost value when it comes to comedic relief. We have to thank God that there's still a G.M. dumb and incompetent enough to not only give Darko Milicic another chance, but also to pair him with Michael Beasley (apparently in an effort to create an All-Dissapointment team) and grossly over-pay for a second-round draft pick (Nikola Pekovic: 3 years for $13 million). To top this all off, Kahn traded one of the better low-post players in the league (Al Jefferson) to Utah for basically nothing (the legendary Kostas Koufos and two useless draft picks), and signed yet another point guard (Luke Ridnour), despite the fact that the Wolves already have Jonny Flynn, Ramon Sessions, and Ricky Rubio (who is undoubtedly very eager to come to the States and play for the basketball-equivalent of Captain Ahab).
Honestly, at this point I wouldn't be surprised if Kahn traded Kevin Love for a sack of potatoes and signed Daunte Culpepper to a five year-$100 million deal.
Chicago is Utah!
While the Bulls struck out on the Big Three of this year's free-agent class, the additions of three erstwhile members of the Utah Jazz (Carlos Boozer, Kyle Korver, and Ronnie Brewer) were more than adequate consolation prizes. With Noah, Boozer, and Deng up front, Chicago has arguably one of the best front-lines in the East, and the backcourt tandem of Rose and either Brewer or Korver is nothing to scoff at either; although presently I'd be hard-pressed to rank them ahead of Miami, Orlando, or Boston, any improvements made to the bench (though a group consisting of Taj Gibson, Korver/Brewer, Omer Asik, and James Johnson isn't necessarily terrible) in the coming weeks and months could be enough to propel the team into the top three of the conference (most likely at Boston's expense).
Joe Johnson Re-Signs with the Hawks
You would think by now that the achievements of R.C. Buford (San Antonio), Sam Presti (Oklahoma City), Kevin Pritchard (recently and unjustly ousted from Portland), Daryl Morey (Houston), Kevin O'Connor (Utah), and other savvy G.M.'s would have led to a league-wide embrace of a new paradigm entailing a bolder and more nuanced approach to team-building, as well as a keener appropriation of resources and money by both G.M.'s and owners. Of course, these principles have all but been unheeded, as can be evinced in the Hawks' soon-to-be-indefensible resigning of Joe Johnson for six years and $120 million (!).
Look, Joe Johnson is a fine player (though by no means a superstar) and it's more than reasonable to suggest that Atlanta had no other choice but to resign its only true star; however, one can't help thinking that by taking the road less traveled (i.e. letting Johnson go or moving him for other assets in a sign-and-trade), Hawks' management could have positioned the franchise nicely for the next 5-10 years. Instead, Atlanta's stuck with a team that's no better than fifth or sixth in the East (depending on how you feel about Milwaukee), with really no chance to improve outside of trading a core player or getting lucky with a mediocre draft pick.
David Kahn: Madman? Or Genius???
Quickly becoming the laughing-stock of the NBA, David Kahn has proven himself to be of the utmost value when it comes to comedic relief. We have to thank God that there's still a G.M. dumb and incompetent enough to not only give Darko Milicic another chance, but also to pair him with Michael Beasley (apparently in an effort to create an All-Dissapointment team) and grossly over-pay for a second-round draft pick (Nikola Pekovic: 3 years for $13 million). To top this all off, Kahn traded one of the better low-post players in the league (Al Jefferson) to Utah for basically nothing (the legendary Kostas Koufos and two useless draft picks), and signed yet another point guard (Luke Ridnour), despite the fact that the Wolves already have Jonny Flynn, Ramon Sessions, and Ricky Rubio (who is undoubtedly very eager to come to the States and play for the basketball-equivalent of Captain Ahab).
Honestly, at this point I wouldn't be surprised if Kahn traded Kevin Love for a sack of potatoes and signed Daunte Culpepper to a five year-$100 million deal.
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